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I want to be rich. Since #RachelDolezal is transracial I want to be transfinancial. Help me become rich and transfinancial today!

money signs

Since Rachel Dolezal is transracial I have decided to become transfinancial.  You see I was born a poor Black child who lived in the wrong economic class.  Deep down I have always felt like a rich woman.

When I pass a Birkin bag, I identify with it. When I see someone wearing a Chanel suit, I want it. I want to be able to finally use my debit card and not yell big money at the counter while hoping that my payment will go through like the rich people do. I have caviar wishes and champagne dreams (even though caviar is nasty), but that evil lady Sallie Mae and her temptress student loans, my car note, the light company and credit cards are in my way.

What can you do? Help me go “from ashy to classy.” Help me forget about spam and give me steak! I WANT TO BE RICH B*OTCH!! Only you can help me become transfinancial and into the right class by donating today.

I am like the hood liquor store. I accept foodstamps, EBT cards, goat, chickens, puppies, nickles, quarters, pennies social security and retirement checks. I don’t judge and I ain’t picky. No payment will be declined!

H/T to Ruth C.

 

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