Career and BusinessFamily

Dear selfish SOBs of the world, Black women are not your emotional trash dumpsters.

People have a terrible habit of assuming every Black woman they know is their emotional dumping ground. Hell no, we’re not.

Black women don’t want your negative energy around us at work, at home, at temple/church or even in the air we breathe.  Some of us won’t even eat your nasty ass food at potlucks because it reeks of cat hair and sadness. We don’t want to hear your sob stories.  We don’t care if your boyfriend doesn’t like chocolate or your dog Fluffy got humped at the dog park. We’ve already been to the five-star restaurant you seem to think we can’t afford even though we make more money and have more passport stamps than you. We are not healing stones or energy providers. We’re damn humans and we want to be left alone.

Let’s talk about you energy suckers at work. Stay away from a Black woman’s door or cubicle. If you want to talk about work, fine.  Set up a meeting or send an email. Everything else is a waste of time. Talk to a Black woman in the hall about your home life? Nah son, she can’t get away with the sh** you do because a Black woman is the last one hired and the first one fired. We go to work because we enjoy the work we do and we want to get paid. That’s it. Some of us pretend to like the energy drainers for our performance reviews. If we aren’t nice, they’d call us angry Black women, so we’ve learned how to play the game. I’m good at pretend smiling when deep down I can’t wait until 5:00 pm so I wouldn’t have to see their face for another 19 hours. But that’s me.

One more thing and this has been burning my biscuits for years and is a bit off track but folks at work seem to take pity on single Black women. Don’t! First of all, we’re not your project. We built ourselves up. Don’t you see how bright my confidence shines? The next point might be surprising. Despite what 3x married Steve Harvey says, some of us like being single so please stop trying to hooking up every Black woman with the security guard because are both Black. He may be a “good man” who seems safe because he is paid $9.00 an hour to smile at your ass, but we have nothing in common except being Black. I have an idea. Why don’t you date his ass since he’s such a catch?

For those of you who think Black women are ATMs, your saviors, your babysitters, backbones or your punching bags, you’re dead wrong. Needing help is one thing, but using Black women is something else. Shoot! We need help too. Take your lazy behind to social services and get the help you need. If you have a partner or spouse, go to them.  HUMAN SERVICES —> USE IT

You offended? Good! Entitled? You’re gonna learn Black women have the right to protect our space and setting boundaries. Stop dumping your crap on Black women. One more question. When was the last time you asked a Black woman who’s helped you if she needed anything? I lied. Second question! When was the last time you said, I’m going help my sister/daughter/wife/aunt out? Let me answer for you. Never! Because you’re selfish as hell. This trash effects our mental and physical health, and you’re running us into the ground. Have you seen the statistics in health categories? Maybe you want that. Today I’m saying no mas. We’re going to live.

Look, if you need to talk, hire a therapist. If you need a sitter, hire one. If you want to be a real friend, ask us how we’re doing and listen to Black women.

What do you think?

The only limit you have is the one you have placed on yourself. Think and be limitless.

If you like this post share it and check out my other posts. In case some of y’all don’t know my website was down for forever because it got attacked, so I had to get it fixed. If you like what I do and can spare $5 or even $10 to help with the costs of keeping it going again, please give. Your help in any way would be greatly appreciated so we can grow undeterred like a rose through concrete. I love you!
Without you, we won’t exist. Consider sharing a gift today. Thank you! ~ BBG

Donate button

Create your personal life plan look at my Change Your Mind, Change Your Life Goals and Action Plan Worksheets. It will help you create goals and action steps to meet them. Check out my book “Change Your Mind, Change Your Destiny” on Amazon for only $2.99. Did I mention it is free for Amazon Prime and Kindle Unlimited users? WE LOVE FREE!! Want to set goals? Take a look at my How to set goals course for $10. You’ll receive a recorded course that you can listen to anytime. Finally, try my 5 steps to building a killer blog and make money from it course. How much is it? Only $10. Start making money online today.



  1. Shay86 2 June, 2017 at 08:42 Reply


    And I noticed that the same people who want me to hear their life stories have the attention span of a gnat whenever I try to talk about my own life. That’s how I knew folks were full of crap and selfish.

  2. Coco Bates 4 June, 2017 at 19:05 Reply
    Such a refreshing read. I never know how prevalent this was until reading this. I’ve been the victim of all of the above statements that you mentioned, ESPECIALLY “them” trying to hook me up with someone. AND don’t let a random black guy walk into the room because for some reason he’ll suddenly be the perfect guy that they think I’m supposed to be with.

Leave a reply