Hey Black man, don’t come into Black women’s spaces and tell us how to tend our garden when you have weeds and trash in yours. As if your opinion is relevant anyway.
You see, we all know that when Black men troll our spaces it really is a smoke screen. What it tells me is that the chickens have come home to roost. You are shaking in your boots because you finally have competition from nonBlack men. You are mad because your Black female harem is shrinking. You fear no one is going to worship your powerless and insecure self. You are worried that, that non Black brother next to you is looking pretty fine to the sistas. You are scared because that non Black man wants to make your sista his wife. You are worried that a non Black man may raise your kids and emasculate you because you weren’t man enough to do it your darn self. You are upset because you told the world Black women were nothing but b##&hs, hoes, sluts, baby mommas, hood rats and pieces of ass in your music, shows and movies just so you can have exclusive access to our uteri and resources. And guess what? Now the world sees that for the lie it is.
You see the age of “nothing but a Black man” is over! The spell is broken and your exclusive pass to Black women just got revoked. We aren’t buying your books or supporting your movies to support your colorism and your racist non Black wife. Hey Taye and Terrence! That insanity died a long brutal death when you started to disrespect the image of your Black mother and elevate everyone else in front of her. To your dismay, the world finally sees what you don’t want them to see. What you refuse to acknowledge. That Black women are nothing but amazing, desirable, loyal beautiful and loving.
Black brothers, if you are upset that Black women are dating and marrying out then step your game up homey. Tend to your garden. Address these issues. In the United States:
1. Over 30% of Black men have been in the justice system and most willingly put themselves there.
2. Over 15% of Black men are unemployed.
3. The Black community has a 50% high school dropout rate.
4. The dominance of violence, colorism, and misogynistic music and entertainment.
5. Over 70% of Black fathers do not live with their children.
6. An overwhelming majorty of Black people murdered are not murdered by the police, Zimmerman or the federal government. It’s Black men.
You see somebody lied to you. You are not the catch you thought you were. My job isn’t to coddle you. That’s your momma’s job. The truth is that Black women are the prime catch and the numbers don’t lie. I don’t care how much Black men say, “I love Black women.” Years of nonreciprocated behavior from Black men shows their lack of credibility. Instead of talking about loving us, go prove it. Partol your streets. Be a real “good Black man” i.e. Malcolm X and shut the destruction and dsyfunction down. Protect and financially invest in the Black community. And finally end the mass abandonment of Black children by Black men. If you don’t, you are full of it and are complicit in the continued victimization of Black women and children.
Let this post be a warning to you because brother you got two choices. Get on board by honoring and protecting Black women and children or get left behind. Right now I see dust because a lot of my sisters are saying bye, adios, sayōnara, ciao, cheerio, adeus, and do svidaniya!
Preach on lil’ mama!
Thank you!
Love It! Very well said.
Excellent and linked at the FB page. You know I approve as I say this over and over and over!
WOW!!! it’s about time black men get a reality check, it amazes me how the basically created this pedestal for themselves as if they are the creme of the crop when in fact they are the lowest of the low, these men are the most POWERLESS men in the world and it’s about time they got knocked off their high horse.
AWESOME!!… Had to QUOTE U on my page!! <3
Damn you are on fire!!
The biggest pile of manure I’ve ever read. To be naive enough to go in with main stream media on your own brothers shows not only a lack of awareness, but a certain lack of maturity as well. If you have had these experiences with brothers, perhaps you innate womens intuition is failing you sister. Your choices are the chains that bind your emotional growth and worse yet connection to your own.
Take some responsibility for the choices in men you make. If you choose to make pet a snake, stop acting shocked and disappointed when he does what snakes do ! No my sister, black men have been the most pursecuted and meligned race of men on the planet. Now no black man should use this as an excuse, but no black woman should use it as her crutch to attempt to shame and embarass her man, the black man.
Here we go with “it is your fault with choosing the man” speech. That is so true Marv, that is why black women are also choosing good men of different races. They realize how they have been treated and publicly talked about by many black men. They know the numbers of eligible men and know they do not have to wait on their “black king” .All these women are not lying. The conditions of the black community are all on display. The mass amount of fathers that abandon the children and the street violence, all the stats are there. Black women do not have to eat crow because the black man is “her man”. Her man should be whoever protects her and treats her accordingly and more black women are finding “her man” elsewhere.
@Mary If you don’t agree with what is being said then i suggest you go else where for this is not the page where we coddle and baby black males, black women have every right to expand our options when it comes to marriage and it amazes me that some of you black women can be so damn loyal to black men when they are not even loyal to you!! black men are the first to swirl when he feels that a black woman does not meet his standard so why shouldn’t black women do the same? if you want to live your life riding and dying for men who don’t do the same for you then go ahead but get out of here with that mess!!
Preach
When Black men stop abandoning their roles as fathers and start fulfilling their role as protectors and providers then they can talk. When we consider the statistics, sadly Black males are in no place to stand in judgment of anyone, especially Black women.
For every comment I see like this, I can show you hundreds of videos aimed to maim and devalue the black woman yet there is something sincerely wrong with us? We’ve had enough of that.
Preach
I try and live my life by the following motto: Give As Good As You Get. I am polite, courteous, as often as possible, classy. BUT I am no follower of the social/political doctrine ‘Ride or Die for the Brothas’. This doctrine is dead on arrival in most if not all situations. This is racial solidarity in the face of unreciprocated racial devotion. Its like that old school jam by Stacy Lattisaw: I found love on a two way street but lost it on a lonely highway. As life in America has opened up for Blacks…so has the social and political opportunities. And instead of being steadfast and true most of Black Man America is too busy being shyster and petty. From the low quality of Black secular music to movies [see Tyler Perry] to books [see Steve Harvey books about thinking like a man]…its all geared to feed the monster ‘All the Blacks are Men and All the Women Are White’. For Black American women to survive and thrive they will need to quit grading Black American Male conduct on a curve. Let his deeds and misdeeds stand for themselves. No one is perfect, above reproach nor should anyone be allowed to be an eternal victim, never responsible for any or all their behavior because the Man [White man] has them caught up in the Trap [drugs, jail, etc]. Enough with the excuses. Either come correct or don’t come at all. Just a suggestion.
Amen
Amen!
preach
I wholeheartedly and completely agree with this message.
Thank you
Preach!!! I love it!!! Thank for calling foul on these black men. This post was dead on. I will share it with everyone I know especially the next time a friend tells me she is pining over a BM who treats her like another groupie in his haram.
Amen
Bravo!!!!
Hey Black man, don’t come into Black women’s spaces and tell us how to tend our garden when you have weeds and trash in yours. As if your opinion is relevant anyway.
This website is irrelevant, bitter black women are life bees, they buzz around angrily, sting bm with their bitter logic and then die a meaningless life….
No one can possibly be more angry than a black men since you guys have a 98% chance of dying by the hands of another black man, i mean you have to be pretty damn angry to have commit 98% of the murders in the black community, does that not sound like a bunch of angry group of men to you? This is not a space for you so why don’t you please go somewhere else? you’re obviously a bitter black man if you’re trolling space for black women anyways.
If my blog was so irrelevant why are you here?
@ 3rd eye. you call these black women but who made them bitter ? (if that was true,which is not), What did that “brotha” do to make here that way. The whole black women need to pick better black men is TIRED. Where are tthese better black men and are they marrying black women. No I am not talking about the very very very slim purple unicorns. To the both of you guys how many black men have you ” PUT IN CHECK” when they were disrespecting black women verbally,physically, or emotionally. Do you speak on it despite the ridicule you get or do you just stay silent, or go along with it. How many black women on the street have you inappropriately called or stop other men from doing so in a disrespectful manner ? Stop deflecting and start becoming part of the solution.
@Tru *Slowly stands up while slow clapping*
Brava!
Brava!!
You get the award for best comment of the week!
Hi! I’m not familiar with your blog but your piece has been suggested to me as opposed to one of mines I wrote recently (about my own scepticism about interracial relationships with white guys). As a french black woman, I may ignore a lot about the situation of Black men vs Black women in the US. However, it seems to me that the points you raise in this piece as black men’s fault, are due, for most of them (just the 4th seems ok to me), to systemic racism.
So, although I recognize and agree wholeheartly that black men should keep remarks about interracial unions for them, and acknolewdge their lack of support sometimes (due to sexism), I disagree about making them responsible of systemic racism. It seems just all wrong.
Can someone explain to me how interracial marriage helps black folks? I’ve never understood this logic. How does running into the arms of your open enemy push us forward? I also don’t understand why Malcolm X is mentioned. It’s true he would not approve of brothers that kill each other or don’t take care of his children. And Malcolm believed that black women should be respected and protected. I agree with all of that. But I don’t think he would condone sistas marrying white men. You can’t just pick apart certain beliefs by Malcolm. If you’re going to quote him-speak on the totality of his beliefs. Not just the parts you like. That tends to be very misleading.
Also the intelligent positive brothers like myself and my male friends get lumped into the same category as the “ignorant thugs” or “trifling no good” brothers. We don’t like seeing our sistas with white men. But we’re not shaking in our boots so to speak.lol We just think its kind of sad in a way. It’s sad that so many sistas feel brothers are so horrible. It’s like some have adopted the same racist stereotypical views as whites. But then again,that may explain why they feel white men are a perfect match for them. Once a person adopts the belief system of their oppressor it’s hard for them to see reality. Their perception has been altered. Having said all that, I still love my sistas and would never date a white woman. Just my 2 cents. One people,one love,one tribe.
There are more BW than BM. So what do you want BW to do?
The problem with the intelligent brothers is that they are silent and complicit. Unlike Malcolm they are not protecting BW and children. Just look at cities like Chicago. When will these good BM shut their fellow BM’s destructive behavior down? When will they patrol our streets like the Panthers?
Black men don’t care about Black women going to White men, they really don’t. White men are no better, they are simply more privileged in this society the same as white women are privileged in this society, white people period. In actuality, if you mad Black women were to look at the data out there, you’d find that white men do more drugs than black men…but they get locked up about 10 times less often…and we know why that is. Also, in a bad economy, blacks, including women, are the last hired and the first fired.
Sure, too many of these black men are a disgrace to themselves and their families but the ideology here on this blog is seriously flawed. And some black women have become worse instead of better-they are catching up pretty quickly with with the good-for-nothing black men as they begin to populate the jails-just look at how many of these younger black women are now devoid of any integrity to even be marriage material. It will get worse before it gets better, that’s the trajectory.
By the way, women, all women, outnumber men except in China.
The bottom line: black men can do better….but so can black women.
The argument here is about 25 years too late. It’s dead on arrival.
All humans are flawed. That said if White men are no better than Black men…and if Black women are also lacking than this convo is dead on arrival as well. No loss, no gain. SO much negative till almost everything is cancelled out. Respect, companionship, fidelity and a shared mindset I believe are what most people are looking for. Once upon a time the Black American woman was led to believe that that could be obtained by yoking oneself to a Black American man. Now in 2013 that’s not such a certainty. Now is the time to broaden the social perimeters that most Black women live within it may very well be a fool’s errand, a trip down a dead end…or it may not. I would never tell any and all Black American women that Black American men are not worth the bother…what I would say is all men regardless of race are worth a chance. I guess you have to believe that Black American women are predestined to be at the side of Black American men…which is something I certainly would never espouse as sane and safe life choice when you consider how many Black American men are incarcerated, dying before 30, gay or adverse to dating Black American women. The pickings…the pickings are slim if you, the Black American woman, are using race as a prerequisite. Whoever’s fault it is its the reality and Black American women have to reach for something besides racial rhetoric and hollow race-based pride that makes Black American women nothing more than a roving standalone harem woman — you can get a Black American man…just be ready to share and be one of many who desire him or have caught his eye. Again White men may very well be no better but the idea of Black American women staying put and letting their lives whither on the vine in honor of race based social perimeters needs to be put to rest.
Preach.
Black men and Black people would be claiming their is an agenda to get White men with Black women destroying the black family, calling the black woman sellout for being with a White man and all kinds of ignorant names. Ironically some Black men and Black women think it’s okay for Black men to date interracially because it’s suppose to be some kind of agenda to get back at White men. But when a Black women dates interracially they feel like it’s messing up the agenda and giving White men more points. They view Black women as property, it’s truly sickening.
I’m a black man I have a car, apartment, associate degee, no criminal record, in good shape, educated and I’m only 21. I occasionally read dating blogs written by black women because for most of my life I only dated black women and I wanted to get insight on how I could improve my relationships. After seeing numerous prejudice, bitter and hateful blogs and journals on the net about black men, I’m completely turned off and I understand why black men date out now.
An Associates Degree? You should have a Bachelors, or working towards one. an Associates only should be a stepping stone to surpass 2 years into a university. No other race of man brag about an Associates Degree. Sigh.
In Oreo’s defense at least he *has* some kind of degree. I don’t think he was “bragging”. Education is paramount of course but some people DO make it in life without one. I’m a black female with no interest in brothers at all. But I see my friends and and sister who still want black men are still single and complaining because the brother doesn’t have the education level as stated in your reply.
And whether you like it or not, black men with higher-than-an-Associates education aren’t exactly checking for black women anyway.
I’m 45 with a graduate degree, my own condo, my own car, a good career and raising two teenage children. I’m divorced and my ex-husband lives in the former family home because he failed to respect the Black marriage and family we had and told me to pack my “ish” and get the F*ck out because he was unhappy. Really? So I packed my ish, took my children, my dog, and my income and got the F*ck out. That is what happens to Black love all too often. I am not bitter or angry, just stating the truth.
Now I am happily dating a White man, not because I set out to do it, but because my dating options left me with BM who were uneducated, woefully ignorant, educated and arrogant, or simply looking to “upgrade” to White women now they they were over 40 and single. Oh, and let’s not forget the one that tried to cheat…really?
Forgive me for wanting an educated, cultured, honest, respectful, hard-working man! I wanted a Black man for that role, but none wanted to put in the work required. A wonderful man did enter my life, and he just happened to be White. He does not find me difficult, bitter, argumentative or disagreeable. That is a myth created to tear down strong, Black women who are taking care of home and themselves and refuse to be anyone’s doormat.
Accept love where you find it. period.
soooooooooooooooooooooooo true! It’s time to date whoever we want. Black men are selfish, they only think about them! They have a strategy.
1) They lie to us. They say they love us because they feel the need to keep us away from white men (and non-black men). At the same time they date everything but Black. And so they can claim, every women want us and black women are unwanted. :/
2) On the other hand, black men are willing to belittle black women in order to be accepted by non-black people… what a man!
And we (black women) are supposed to wait for them, our “black king” (lol!) while there are plenty of non black men who are ready to love us?
black women, Wake up!
@Tess
I agree. I do prefer Black men but I am not going to wait around for them though. I do believe Black women should date outside of their race, well other minority men though not White American men.
Wow, I looked around this site and honestly as a Black female, I love it. I love this site. Many of the topics on here really interesting and heart felt as a Black woman living in racist AmeriKKKlan.
Honestly I can’t stand White American men but I do believe that Black women should date outside of their race. I am not happy with Black men these days. I hate the way they disrespect Black women and uplift non Black women and the way they leave their children with baby mommas.
I think Black women should date other minority men since most White American men are racist and indifference to our struggle. Plus as a Jamaican woman, I can relate to Caribbean Hispanics especially if they are Afro Latino.
I 110% agree with you Sister! You captured my very feelings in this post regarding racial dating!
Well, as a Black Man, hear this STRONG BROTHER ROAR…….”sistah”!
You sitting mighty proud, gloating and boasting about the attention you getting from men outside of the Black race, and while your rant is more emotional than rational, it does not translates to the reality you “think” is a red-carpet rolled out with rose
-pedals for the Black Woman.
It’s blind ignorance….even while you happily married outside your race and sporting bi-racial children. Same goes for the brothas with White women.
(Applause)……does it make y’all feel White, too?? Just saying. Smh.
Meanwhile, Black woman/man feeling that “Interracial Love” think they getting back at each others for dissing them but too dense to see the consequences of this “Crusade” to destroy, not just the Black Man/Woman but their own Black Race in the process! Dumb logic breeding dumb logic!
Check the stats, it’s not embattled Black Women/Man leaving for IR. It’s young Black Women/Man that hasn’t yet experience a real relationship, leaving their race because of a TREND YOU started. Not so much because of a bad relationship they experienced but a Media engineered tool aimed at dividing the Black Woman from the Black Man. And you fools lap it up like SUCKERS!
That’s the reality, sistahs and brothas!
You mean to tell me racism is over? And every White Man and Woman love every Black Man and Woman?? No, Israelites. Wake up!
You are Hebrew. Hebrew Israelites! You are of Royal Blood. Yah’s Chosen People.
You are in this Babylon America because our forefathers didn’t keep their Covenant with the Most High. We are the consequences for their action. And the Curses of Deuteronomy 28:15-68 outlines our conditions in nearly 400 years of slavery, oppression and racism. And IR is also part of the Curses.
Prophecies are still working their way through and if you think your presence in this Babylon America is forever, you are clearly mistaken. This is not our ancestral homeland. Promises were made in those prophecies and I ensure you, America will not be the end of us.
We’re leaving, rather we want to or not. That’s the prophecy. So, instead of gloating about dating outside your race, turn to Yah and give Him our due-obedience. He’s kicking our asses right now and IR is an ass-kicking to us. Do you understand, Black Woman and Man?
Before I close out….I want to shed some light on the history of the White Woman/Man you been fucking, eating them out and making babies for them.
They are:
Recessive Mutant, Species
Carry 4% to 9% of the Neanderthal Genes
Barbarous in their Origins
They are, what the bible refers to as the Gentile Nation…..Heathens that practiced bestality, worshipped pagan gods and didn’t know any better until they were civilized. All their history is stored up in their DNA which bring them the sort of paranoia complex where they feel the need to Hate, Practice Racism, Control, Lie, Steal, Mass Murderers and the list goes on.
YOU, BLACK WOMAN AND MAN, IS MADE GENETICALLY SUPERIOR. ACT LIKE IT:
Modern-Human haplomarker
Melanin
Dominant Genes
Spiritual
Humanity
Love
Nurture/Caring
Activated Pineal Gland
These are traits that set you apart. Do you know why? Because you were FIRST on Earth before any other nationality. The whole world has the neanderthal genomes which is BAD. Blacks do not carry any traces of the neanderthal genomes or defective genes.
That’s your token Yah gave to you, to set you apart from the world as His own. Act like it!! And with this royal blessing, you have been fucking, mating neaderthal Apes….pink men/women who are inferior to you, genetically, and still envy you because of your status, genetically.
You giving them babies, letting them violate you, sexually….even in marriage. Making sport of you, even in marriage. You give them melaninated children whom are bi-racial and they program them to date Whites or any other nationality besides Blacks. Know why? They want our Melanin, our Dominant Genes to re-make their ethnicity with dominant genes and like suckers, you give it to them.
If Yah wasn’t so merciful, he’ll let them breed us out…..which IR is how they can do it. You don’t look at these things though. You busy hating your own and living that Babylon lifestyle to please the rest of the world against your own, Royal selves. Pathetic!
Sistas snd Brothas, you are Power together. You are Majestic together. Love one another. Black is Beautiful. One Love! One Love!
Shalom
{jah}…..I”am a 49 year old black woman and I would to let you know that I enjoyed reading your comment you should write your own blog. I read all the comments and I like this site and I will came back again but this comment stands out at me the most would like to hear most from this person………………………………..
Umm, this article is DAMNED IGNORANT, RACIST and STUPID!!! I date out because I’m ATTRACTED TO OTHER ethnicities! It’s called ATTRACTION. Black men don’t need to step up anything. Why is it that black women always have to have a NEGATIVE REASON for wanting to date white men? Why can’t it just be because of attraction.
You can take the most handsome,well educated, well rounded, sensitive, loving, caring, giving black man in the world and set him before me and I’m still not going to date him because guess what? I’m NOT ATTRACTED TO BLACK MEN!!! I’m ATTRACTED TO WHITE MEN. I LOVE MILKY SKIN AND BLUE EYES AND BLONDE HAIR.
Not that it needs to be justified. So stay out of my business. Black men being wonderful people isn’t going to make me stop thinking that Brad Pitt is fine so please pull your head out of your ass and recognize that none of us are slaves and we can date and be attracted to whomever we please.
IT’S ATTRACTION, IT’S NATURAL, SO GET OVER IT!!! IT’S NOT GONNA CHANGE.YOU DON’T GET TO TELL PEOPLE WHO THEY CAN LOVE SO MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS PLEASE!
I stumbled across this blog all I’ve got to say so this:
SAY IT AGAIN!
Black men need to hear it again.
ONE more time.
(Nods head while re-reading blog).
Wow! powerful piece! On that note I’m subcribing!
The reason you don’t see that many Black women with White men is because the White men don’t want them. And if they do fool around with a Black woman, they want to keep the relationship undercover….because they’re running stuff and want no negative interference. Of course I’m generalizing but you get the point.
I’d say accuse Black men of something they really are not doing and should care about because Black men ain’t sweatin no Black woman with a White man - so this whole article attempting to denigrate Black men is pointless. On a grand scale, Black women are no better than Black men and vice versa. Remember, Black men are too busy going after every woman other than a Black woman.
The White Empire has Black people losing their freakin minds, always has…and this is how it manifests itself. I can’t imagine what some White people who read this kind of mess must think.
42% of black women will NEVER marry. Almost 1/2 overall. Black women account for 66% of new HIV cases,every 35 minutes a black women test positive for HIV. The leading case of death from black women from 25 to 34 is an HIV related illness. Black women have the highest rates of diabetes and high blood pressure. Black women suffer heart disease twice as high as white women. Black women out of all races of women are the least likely to be dated by men of any race. But they’re so desired lol.
If they want to date outside their race then let them only a fool trust a woman especially a black woman lets be real white ppl run the world woman are attracted to money and power so once u understand that them u understand there’s
Nothing u can do but get money have fun and never marry a black woman period
Dear Bougie Black Woman (Girl) and I use this term of endearment loosely after reading this hysterical juxtapose of a topic, of seemingly timeless, “The dichotomy of Black men & Black Women, and why the loveless Relationship between the two.”
Let’s Begin with your Title of your Blog, and I quote, ” I’am a proud African-American Woman that loves to discuss topics that empower Black Women.” I firmly believe in freedom of speech, and that choosing a mate or partner in life and love should be of one’s own free will. However, if you are a black woman that loves and appreciates her blackness, then why do your choice of words seem so callous, scolding, and scorching against black men. Hence, is stock of a black man not that from which your come from?
I could dissect the many layers to your very not only gender biased but, detrimentally and disproportionate feelings towards black men.I have more often than not, found an abundance of blatant self-hate amongst black women, and their disdain for black men more readily, than any other race of women in society.
While other racial or ethnic groups may very well have impending and relevant issues with men of their very background, why is that they would rather choose to address their issues internally and seek resolve. Black women such as yourself would argue, that the resolve is they are weak and passive. I find their decision more pragmatic, sensible, and non-embarrassing to themselves, and more advantageous.
Please pay close attention to my words, and heed the following as a soft whisper: “Black men who have an agenda, are not concerned if you choose to date outside your race. It is exclusively your prerogative to be with whomever you so deem worthy of your space and time.” So, please do yourselves a favor and forever and hence forth dismiss the notion that black men of substance, objectively sit around throughout the day seeking to foil your interracial unions. This is completely and utterly asinine to concede such foolishness.
It is with certainty that there are individuals who poorly represent examples of manhood, womanhood, and who are not incentives across the board in all spectrum.
It is so disheartening and very sad when black women think you have accomplished something magnificent when you corral and band together, in efforts to lift your might verbal swords and pitch your efforts to assert your woman hood and femininity against, “The Brothers.”
Let me offer an epiphany for all and please consider this, if a man or a woman chooses a poor fit or mate, it is your choice to stay or to leave. You have no one to blame but, yourself. And, to further drive this rebuttal to everything you have written in your discussion: you offer not one effective communication or reasoning as to what black women may do to assist in healing the divide between black men and women. You only assert negative commentary against black men, and up-hold dating inter-racially as if your garnish merit in doing so.
I will not use slander against you black woman. Nor will I try to persuade you from your efforts. but, I will close with this: if your only argument is that you have tried to substantially to sustain a relationship with a quality black man: educated, poised, a good father, a good husband, teacher, mentor, advocate, and to no avail you were left with no option but, to find that which you seek beyond the confines of the very black skin that you wear proudly Bougie Black Women, perhaps you did not search diligently, may have utilized a more stringent examination in-order to narrow down suitable suitors, or perhaps a self-examination of your very own past, present, in efforts that your future may be brighter here and now.
There are a plethora of black men such as myself who are very well educated and hold post doctoral, doctorate, Masters, J.D. etc. While these are all immensely fabulous accolades, still common sense in terms of how black women and men speak of each other is seemingly still in short supply, metaphorically speaking.
Take the time to consider what I have written and how it applies to you before you write a response based on your emotional response. I would rather read those written pragmatically, based upon logic and substantiated on reason.
Noble 1, PhD., J.D.
Manhattan, NY
This has to be one of the most poorly written rants of nothingness. You obviously do not believe in proof reading, exemplified by the onslaught of typos and poor verbiage.
Furthermore, I’m going to label this article, Willie Lynch new age, as this was seemingly written by a child.
If this was written by a black woman who is an adult, although this is highly unlikely, you should be embarrassed.
Please educate yourself with knowledge, and fill yourself with love of self because black women who follow such an example are truly lost.
After reading reply comments, this is very deplorable and shameful.
@karl first of all lets get one thing straight, when it comes to HIV rates black men have the highest rate than ANY other race of men due to ur homosexual behavior, 70% of black women who are hiv positive contracts the virus from black men but 70% of black men who are hiv positive contract the virus from other men. Black men are so quick to point out the flaws of a black woman but you show little concerns about taking responsibility for your own flaws which is why you stand as the worlds most POWERLESS!! men. encase you didn’t know black women and interracial marriage have increased nearly 200% so check the stats on that!!
Im seriously laughing at the hoard of insecure black men, flooding the comments section, in an attempt to make black women feel inferior and intimidated; hoping that it would somehow persuade us to go back to being sidekicks to black men. Lol! Not!!!! But nice try though. Oh and noone wants us? Lol! Oh, is that why ive been dating nothing but white men for two years? Get out of here with your bitterness and hate of the happiness that black women are experiencing with nonblack men. Get over it! Black men are powerless and no smart woman, in her right mind would ever want a powerless, immature, mentally caged little boy; pretending to be men. I gave up on black men and their sorry excuses along time ago. You can keep your harems of various hoochies, diseases, empty wallets and empty brains. Ive moved on. Stop cyber stalking black Wo
men who dont want you. Why are you here?
Damn right! Get ’em, girl! They need to sit down with that jibber jabber. No one is listening anymore! We fought the good fight, however while we were fighting for Black men, they were fighting us!
All I can say is that I do not prefer black men at all. I mostly date black men,and my current boyfriend of over a year is black. Do I prefer them? No. Black men hold themselves in the highest regard and constantly tear black women down, whether she is “light skinned,brown skinned, or dark skinned”, weaved up or natural, thick or skinny,etc. Black women literally can’t win with black men. It disheartens me since both of my parents are quite racist and do not approve of interracial relationships,which is hypocritical on my father’s part since he lusts after non-black women and cheated on my mother with several non-black women (my stepmother was white…”was” is the operative word since they got divorced). Anyway, it’s disheartening because black men were always supposed to be my option but they were always the ones who said I was “too smart” or tried to treat me like I was just a big ass.Granted,not all black men are bad guys…there are so many great ones,but they’re all taken. The problem is that the ones who are left are just not interested in black women anymore. I’ve been with non-black men,and they seem to be sweeter and less abrasive in the sense that they’re more understanding. The sad thing is that,historically speaking, black women were raped by white slave owners but it’s not commonly reported that white slave owners also forced (literally,forced them to have sex against the women’s will) black men and women to have sex in order to keep the slave population afloat. Though it’s neither group’s fault, it seems like black men have forgotten why many of them exist: their black mothers allowed them to be breathe air. Now, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with interracial dating but it bothers me how whenever I like a non-black man or if I’m seen in public with one (whether we’re friends or I’m actually dating him)it’s a big deal to black men; they’ll stare, make comments,say something to me to get the guy involved, and so forth.They’re allowed to comment on how “wrong” it is,how it’s somehow racist or inappropriate,how the guy doesn’t know what to do with “all dat ass”,etc. But I never would ever do the same thing in the opposite situation. I wouldn’t dare say something negative to some non-black woman because she’s with a black man. Like,how much sense does that make? NONE. I don’t know. The sooner black men can get rid of their egos,the easier it’ll be for black women to not feel the need to bring them back to earth and make them be humble (of course, they say it’s an attitude but I don’t see it that way…I’m soft as hell).
@ Just Saying,
“The sad thing is that,historically speaking, black women were raped by white slave owners ”
I hate when I hear this nonsense. Yes, that happened…but tell me this…NOW, in 2014…WHO is responsible for the majority of rapes of Black women? Is it White men?
Exactly.
This is an excellent piece. Don’t even get me started on how insecure Black men who work retail (restaurants, grocery stores, chain stores, etc.) will blatantly disrespect and glare at Black women who are with White men in public, regardless of whether or not they’re coupled! And God forbid, don’t let it be a lighter skinned black female with naturally long hair, big boobs and a big butt with an athletically built, tall White man. Watch the daggers and fireworks explode! That seems to enrage the insecure damaged beyond repair ‘bruthas’ to no end, lolol!!! I call it the “Lakeview Terrace” syndrome. It’s so pathetic! Worse than that, these kinds of Black men get away with this sort of discriminatory abuse of power in mid management positions, because they are black men, and black men are not perceived to be racist or abusing their little positions of authority in a passive aggressive way in public. What a sad, sorry joke these clowns are. They obviously have never learned that anyone who reacts with envy and hatred due to insecurity is just admitting that they feel inferior and useless.
Please, please, please keep exposing how certain kinds of black ‘men’ take every opportunity to go out of their way to be rude and glare at Black women who are obviously coupled with White men in public. I have enough stories to write a book about it! I do believe that it’s the last form of socially acceptable blatant racism in North America. Liberals and progressives just look the other way, which is a form of collusion or ‘co-signing’, if you will.
No matter what, keep doing you. Some people will hate you simply for the way that other people love you! Laugh at it and be grateful for the ones who truly love and respect you. Feel nothing but pity and contempt for the rest. If they are trying to cut you down, then it must mean that they are already beneath you.
You are absolutely right about insecure Black men ‘negging’ Black women with psychological warfare to monopolize mating rights by constantly degrading us. But think about it like this, how much of a low life do you have to be to denigrate and devalue Black women in order to have a shot at dating? It would be hilarious, were it not so pitiful.
Mrs Butterworth,
When Black men working in restaurants, chain stores, etc., see a White man with a Black women as someone other than his housekeeper or nanny, they have the tendency to stare because they are surprised, not because they are “disrespectful” or that it has anything to do with “racism”. You’re desperately grasping for straws here. It is because it is so unusual to see a White man with a Black women as his significant other. Each instance of this is somewhat an anomaly. Witnessing such is like seeing a rainbow after the rain.
And somehow you don’t realize that not only does the “unusual couple” attract the attention of the Black man, it attracts the attention of everyone else-other White men and women, Black women, kids and everyone else……..because it is something that is so seldom seen. At that moment, it is the elephant in the room.
As I had written before on this thread, Black men, when all the dust clears, don’t care about Black women dating White men. There is a lot of evidence out there that proves this.
When it comes to women, Black women in general are the most undesirable. Whenever Black men “make it”, the first thing they go looking for is a White woman to have on their arm. The opposite is true for a successful White man….he goes looking for a White woman or some other race, just not a Black one. And Black men don’t have to be successful. All the way from poor Black men to middle class Black men, many seek White women.
So this “glaring” you speak of is because of the shock, that’s it. And Black men are not using “psychological warfare to monopolize mating rights degrading us [you all]”. Mostly, you all degrade yourselves which is one of the reasons the Black woman in general in the US is likely the most undesirable woman of all other races present.
I know it would make you all feel better if what you said and have allowed yourselves to believe, was true, but it’s not. Plain and simple.
I love all women and would date any race of woman but as a first choice, I prefer a Black woman. But many other brothers…they are just the opposite.
You know that old adage, “all men are dogs”. Well, that doesn’t change depending on the man’s color. C’mon now, read some books, watch some movies and ask White women about how much of a dog some of their White men have been/are. The fact is , if a woman has a good man, she has a good man and that has nothing to do with his color that he happens to be a good man.
I hope you read this as well PinkMerlot.
I married my husband, who is white. I never had to interact with a black man my whole life. I don’t regret it, I have a husband who is financial stable, a dream house and a man who brings me blankets when I am sick. In my single years, I dated biracial Latino or mainly white Europeans. My husband is from Italy and loves me because I am beautiful, he spoils me. I attracted all men and many black men, they just didn’t have their lives together. 30 years old dressed in a child’s genre of music without a job only appeals to Tanaynay.
First, let me say bravo…I’m a 40 year old black woman. I’ve can’t even begin to tell you how hurt and disappointed I am in the black men in my life. That old bullshit about choosing the “wrong” black man is truly old and tired and a crutch that is used to explain despicable behavior. 1st the cheating. Every single black female I know, every single one of them not matter how beautiful, educated, uneducated, light skinned, dark skinned you name it no matter what quality black woman has been cheated on my her black man…not just once but like it’s a sickness…can’t stop screwing their co workers or strippers or friends or YOUR friends with the hell is it with the inability to be faithful? Then always blames these women saying some bull to discredit their ability to please their men…so all these women are bad at sex…or it that the black male has no self control and prefer acting like dogs in heat? I divorced my husband of 15 years for his loose behavior. Boyfriends for cheating, I mean it’s an epidemic what the hell is it?? On top of that the colorism and discriminating a making fun of your own women’s natural hair, and dark skin and bodies. I no longer want anyblack men near me I cant deal with the pain and humiliation anymore…I have cried for twenty years since I came out into the world of men and women…I’m beautiful, caramel colored woman, good job, my own house and I treat my man like the king he deserves to be yet still…always infidelity. Most of my friends and female co workers are single now by choice they just can’t deal with it.
I really don’t understand? Do you guys really think that im going to abuse you, or not take care of my children? Is this why I cant find a women, let alone a black women?
I try to date black women and get turn down, all the time? Is it because of the above ideals?
I think you need to get out of the weak hood men,, or at least don’t shed your ideas, of black men on ALL black men…..
Job-check
committed- check
religious-check
Single- YEP
Screw it sorry for ranting Good day yall.
Some folks are so lost they couldn’t find themselves in a well lit room if they were the only one there.
Black men don’t care about Black women dating White men. So to all the ladies on here, that’s a myth and perhaps if you somehow think they care, you’re seeking attention from Black men.
Why don’t they care…..because many Black men prefer a woman who is not Black….had no one noticed?
In the end though, it’s about making good choices, not about the color of the skin. Another way to look at this is too many Black women make bad choices and take no responsibility in the choices they make. It’s like picking up a venomous snake and then blaming the snake for biting.
So for all of them or most who have had a bad experience with a Black man and are raising fatherless children-they made a bad choice. It had absolutely nothing to do with color or race. And when one makes a bad choice, one needs to look in the mirror and check themselves out first before they even think about a person being bad based solely on their race or color-it’s just stupid to think that way and it has nothing to do with reality.
I love this article. I stopped dating all together. Its to much of a headache for me. I have notice in the past year or so that there has been an increase of black men who have shown a hatred for black women online. Almost every Youtube video I see of a black man he speaks negatively of black women. Black men are the ones out here on the downlow, sleeping around, killing and robbing each other, harassing black women for no reason on the street, unemployed, and are the ones who have their hand out. I find that its usually the black men who have nothing to offer nor bring to the table who have all these demands when it comes to the type of women they want to date.
In my personal experience as a black woman who only dated black men, I will be the first to admit that I exercised poor judgment in the past regarding my selection of men who absolutely did not have their act together regarding finances, job, credit, car or a place of residence but I figured hey as long as one us has it together, we can help uplift the other person. Well, my arms got tired from trying to uplift men who were satisfied with their current situation and made no attempts to change. Fast forward, I am 50 plus and now in a relationship with a wonderful gentleman of a different race. I did not actively seek this out, it just happened. We both discovered along the way that we wanted to be in a loving, healthy and happy relationship so race just did not seem to matter. We shrug off the comments and glares from the black men as well as a few white people. We just keep it moving.
well if this is so true than how come 70% of black women are still single. As a black man married to an Asian women, the white men and others can have you. 🙂
Trolling black men - get the hell off of websites like this. Y’all ain’t shit. It’ll be a matter of time before you abandon your non-black wife and kid(s) just like you left black women for the non black females you brag about being married to. Weak males. Die off already.