Singer Conya Doss. Image via IslandMix

OK I am going to get some folks mad and other folks may threaten to sue but I do not care. I am not getting into the hair wars #Teamwigs,weaves,natural,relaxed,scurl,jerricurl,Hawaiiansilky, texturized,wavecap,hotcomb,flatironed,hairdyed just as long as it looks good but I do know a rip off when I see one. I know when I see a company trying to bank off of my sisters’ hair by hook or by crook.

These companies are ripping you off. Why you may ask? They are taking advantage of the fact that you went natural. These companies are repackaging the alteration of your hair by selling you a magical curling custard that promises to change your 4B/4C hair into a 3C. They are promising to do what relaxers do without permanently altering your hair. No guilt for giving into Dark and Funny, right?

Can I honestly ask you a question? How many full jars or bottles of crap have you went through with hardly any or minimal results?  I can. TOO DARN MANY!!  I thought for some the purpose of going natural was to avoid chemicals and or save money. It seems like those companies are still digging deep in your pockets by pitching unknown garbage that you are letting seep into the pores of your skin. Could you believe I spent $35 bucks on a conditioner? A conditioner with a fancy French name that I can’t even pronounce. By the way, I still have it in my cabinet. It turns out that VO5/Sauvé for $.98-$1.05 and an olive oil spray for $4.99 (been a fan since 2000) works better for me. That is all I use. I flat-iron once a month and I rarely use the spray (by the way I workout every day too). It is useless to flat-iron in the summer here in Memphis so I just sleep in flexirods or I wrap my hair and go. Call me a conspiracy nut but they are still doing what you didn’t want these companies to do to you in the first place.

Well if you do not believe me about the repackaging of our hair all I ask you to do is to take a look at the models promoting the garbage. I don’t see 4B/4C models. What I do see are mostly biracial or multiracial models pitching the trash. There is nothing wrong with that but the companies should be honest enough to tell you what their product can and cannot do.

So here is some advice as if I am qualified to give it. Learn from our elders. Yes, they did it without all the mythical chemicals, magical conditioners and funny smelling hair oils that promise to turn your hair into the same texture as the model on the box. Our grandparents and great grandparents had plenty of hair. They took care of it by simply washing it, doing a press and curl, putting it in hair rollers and/or applying light oil to it. They used olive oil or whatever. By the way, the same goes for you relaxed women. Ya’ll are product junkies too. I have been natural and relaxed so I know.

***I am not a professional. My advice is for entertainment purposes only. Ok now back to your regularly scheduled program.***

My advice is to sleep in a satin scarf, rarely use oil, avoid heat, no pulling with scrunches and rubber bands, try using flexirods, eat healthy, drink water and enjoy life. Basically leave your hair alone. You do not need a lot of stuff. That’s a marketing company’s way of making us codependent on the latest trend. They want to make us feel inadequate about ourselves so we can buy their junk and feel better about ourselves. Folks the reality is that happiness doesn’t come in a bottle.

Anyway give Miss Messy’s, Yucky Funky Mustard, Scam and Lovely, the YouTuber’s pitching the garbage, Harold’s Brother, Mixed Fixed, Mystical Suzie’s Elixir and others a rest and save that money for a trip you will never forget. And remember its just hair.