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Sis I want you to be selfish. Yes selfish. It’s time to focus on you so I want to ask you by this time next year where do you want to be?

Let me be honest. We all think about it including me. It took me a while to realize that besides my love for my family, friends, politics, history and all things New York sports another one of my loves is to improve the lives of Black women.

I owe Black women everything because they have given me so much. I honestly feel like my purpose is to show Black women that we have the right to an abundant, beautiful and limitless life. I want Black women to see how absolutely stunning, smart and fabulous we really are. I want to see positive images of Black women and I want Black women to become empowered. That means controlling our image, taking an active role in politics, business etc. and moving into positions of power.  This blog for me is a small step in doing so. Sometimes I falter by focusing on the ratchetness but your comments always knock me right back on track.

Enough about me. This is about you so lets find a quiet area. Get comfortable and close your eyes. Lets pray, focus and/or meditate. For the next few minutes ask yourself what do you want. Visualize it and put yourself into your visualization. Do you want a new career? Visualize it. Do you want to improve your spiritual, physical, emotional and/or mental health? Visualize it.  How about traveling around the world? Visualize it. Do you want to acquire wealth or start a new family? Visualize it. Regardless of what it is it’s time to figure it out. Here are some tips to do so:

  1. I am a huge believer in the power of images on the mind. We see therefore we believe so lets start by making a vision board. Put everything you want on it. Don’t hesitate or be embarrassed. This is your vision and no one else’s  So be specific.
  2. Put your vision board in a place that forces you to look at it every day. Try the refrigerator door, on a mirror, or any place you visit often.
  3. Get rid of the junk. Junk people, food, TV or radio or thoughts. I know getting rid of those things is tough but they will only distract you. You may regret it today but trust me you will feel better about it tomorrow.
  4. Accept that you are absolutely worthy of your goals. Some of us have a hard time doing this because of the media, society’s or our own view of ourselves because Black women are supposedly mammies, the backbone of the Black family, etc. Well I am here to tell you to stop. You are god’s creation like everyone else therefore you are worthy of success.
  5. Let the fear of not trying motivate you. Fear is a disease that affects dreams. There are two ways to deal with fear. It can either kill your dreams (blue pill) or inoculate your dreams (red pill). Choose one. Morpheus in The Matrix said, “This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill- the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. (ignorance of illusion) You take the red pill- you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.” My advice is to take the red pill.
  6. Like Nike said, “just do it.”
  7. When you are down or when you have downtime visualize your goals. I do this when I am unsure or torn between short-term enjoyment or long-term success. The vision of  long term success always wins.
  8. Once you have achieved your goals you will realize that you are only limited by the space between your ears. So think limitless!

Folks the time to start isn’t tomorrow or next year. The time to start on your goals is now. So what’s stopping you? Really the question should be who is stopping you? It’s not money, your situation or time. The only one stopping you is you. So let’s get started.