“People often say that “beauty is in the eye of the beholder”, and I say that the most liberating thing about beauty is realizing that you are the beholder. This empowers us to find beauty in places where others have not dared to look, including inside ourselves.” Salma Hayek
Growing up I didn’t think I was beautiful. There were times I couldn’t even look in the mirror. I had internalized years of being in a negative environment and negative language. I believed every word others said about me. I was told my hair was too nappy, my lips were too big, and my ass was too small. I am sure you heard it too. I was even told I wasn’t smart. Lucky enough for me I knew that part was a lie. Sadly, my self-esteem depended on the approval of others. It changed when I saw how awesome I was. Very few people know that even though I am a” Bougie Black Girl” I overcame tremendous odds to be here. When I realized how far had I came and I was shocked. I went from being homeless to joining the military and attending college. Quite honestly I could have either been dead or stripping but at 17 I decided to take ownership of my life. Today, it feels good to look in the mirror and see that I am beautiful on the inside and out. If I can see how beautiful I am you see how beautiful you are too. So enough of about me. I am here for you. I am here to tell you that you are beautiful in every single way. Let me show you the beauty I see in you. Here is how:
- Accept your flaws. No one is perfect. It is our imperfections that make us uniquely us. For example, if you have stretch marks see them as proof you are alive. Look, we all have our scars. Some of us hide them better than others. Also thing about it like this, if everyone was perfect we’d be a boring bunch.
- Focus on your assets. Too many of us focus on what we are bad at. We try to improve it only to find out we are mediocre at it and still feel bad about it. If you are good at public speaking why spend your time behind a desk? If you are good dancing why are you sitting on your ass? The fact is when you are doing things you are not good at you will always be miserable. So get up and start dancing! Cha-cha again!
- You are an original. There is no one in the world like you. You are a gift from the heavens. Yep, it’s a fact that there is only one you. How do I know? Well I am a twin. My sister and I may look alike but we are different. She likes chocolate. I think it’s gross. She likes high heels and I prefer flats. You see, even though we may the closet DNA possible we are still uniquely us. If you are quirky, nerdy, chic or sexy or all four embrace it and by the way, lucky you. I am a nerd and I make no bones about it and I love it. Shout out to the Black Girl Nerds blog!!!
- Make a list. You have probably seen that I have said this before but I don’t care. It’s important enough to be repeated. List five awesome things about you. Not about your kids or partner. I am talking about you. What are your hidden talents? Have you done some act of kindness? I can sing or at least that’s what my momma says. If you can do something, write it down and read it once a day. You see how amazing you are?
- Tell your story. Have you overcome tremendous odds? Are you the first to accomplish something? We all have a story. Tell it. Testify at church. Write a blog. Heck I will help you get started. You never know how many people you may inspire. Isn’t that awesome?
See I told you, you were beautiful. Now show the world and most importantly yourself that you are too. Remember the only limit you have is the one you have placed on yourself. So think and be limitless.
Don’t forget to follow the 100 Days to a Brand New You Challenge here.